It has been a year since I heard the sound of your voice, felt the soft caress of your hands or watched your sly smile and that mischievous glint in your green eyes.
It has been a year since I have felt your warm embrace and felt safely encircled by your strength.
It has been a year since I was able to touch your face and to tell you how much I love you. To reassure you and myself that we were a team and we could face any adventure together.
It has been a year that I have been alone with my thoughts. Thoughts filled with tortured memories of your last moments, of the tears that you cried when you knew that you were leaving me for the final time.
It has been a year since I have felt complete and whole.
As I face this anniversary, I understand, for me, that there will be no relief from this terrible loss of you and of myself. I realize that I may never heal from cancer’s cruel tearing us from one into two. The wound is still so fresh and it has torn my heart so deeply.
You were the best part of me and I feel that I lost my way when you could no longer walk by my side. I am so much less by your leaving…
How many years will I walk in the shadows of this time? A lifetime of brokeness seems as long as eternity itself….
But, until, I can see your face again, Until that moment when I translate from this form of existence into the next, may God watch between you and me until we meet again..
Until then, my love, until then….
Filed under: anniversary, beloved, bereavement, cancer, death, grief, healing, lonliness, loss, love, sorrow
There are no words that can make you feel better or keep you from feelings of longing for your love. I just wanted to drop by and let you know that you’re in my thoughts and prayers, my friend. You are in my prayers a lot, but especially so now.
The other day I was praying for you and realized that it must be about a year now and I was right – a very difficult year indeed, but you have come through it and you are getting further through your grief and having new perspectives and new experiences. I’m so proud of you and so honored to be able to watch you grow as you continue this journey. You are always on my heart sweetie! Hugs!
A most touching, heartfelt post.